SpeakEasy
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•March 22, 2017
Just Don’t Ask for My Social Security Number
I walked into a bar, err, rather the Comcast Cable Co. on Long Beach Island. I had a simple request. I wanted to change the name on the account. For the past 15 years my bills had been sent to my…
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•March 15, 2017
Spring: a Time of Restoration
Everyone loves spring, the beautiful season that lifts our spirits and seduces our senses with its exquisite colors, transporting fragrances and those wonderful bird whistles and chirps that make…
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•March 8, 2017
Fickle Fashion
I know by the time you read this it may be warm enough to believe it is spring, but I persist. It was a very cold day when I decided I had better find a nice warm turtleneck sweater toput onwhen I…
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•February 22, 2017
A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Old Age – I Realized I Had Arrived!
Realizing I had arrived at dreaded “old age,” I found it wasn’t as bad as I had expected. It’s like dreading the dentist, then hearing, “You have no cavities.” There actually are benefits to OA. What…
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•February 20, 2017
Feng Shui Fail
Steven walked into the living room where I was skimming through a small, turquoise-colored book I’d just purchased. “Feng shui?” he asked, reading the cover of the book.
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•February 15, 2017
Two Ways to Fly Old Glory
As I walk my Manahawkin neighborhood, the same streets I walked to trick or treat as a 12-year-old over 50 years ago, I pass homes and cars displaying the Red, White and Blue. I’ve been thinking a…
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•February 1, 2017
The Tough Guy’s View on Colds
I got my flu shot this year, along with my pneumonia shot and a shingles shot – gotta love Medicare! And, so far, I haven’t gotten the flu.
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•January 25, 2017
Forever Connected to Vietnam War and Its Vets
I have met several veterans here in Little Egg Harbor, and while I feel deep gratitudefor all veterans, it is to the Vietnam era that I feel the closest connection.
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•January 18, 2017
It’s a Happy New Year Because We’re Here
The Christmas tree is still standing in the spot we so diligently picked out only a few weeks ago. It is a bit worn for wear, as the ornaments seem to cling to the branches less and less with each…
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•January 11, 2017
Me and Meryl Streep
I once wrote a poem called “Me and Meryl Streep” after I saw her dance in a movie about spinsters in Ireland. I wanted to be able to do what she did. I was born here in South Jersey between Barnegat…
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•December 14, 2016
Marvel’s Doughnuts, No Locks: Sweet Memories
In the late 1960s, when we began renting on Long Beach Island, cottages were not air-conditioned. You considered yourself lucky if there was an attic fan in the dormer. The windows stayed open and if…
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•December 7, 2016
Not Just Another Swan Story
We live on an island, which comes with its blessings and also its curses. High tides, full moons, nor’easters, incessant winds, hip boots for wading from your front door to your car parked on higher…
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•December 7, 2016
Where Ya From?
You gotta love living on Long Beach Island in the off-season. I know lots of folks live here in the summer and go somewhere else in the winter, but if I had the financial advantages I’d do it in…
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•November 30, 2016
What Beats Hanging Up on Telephone Scammers?
The blinking, red light on the answering machine indicated there was a message, but the number was not familiar. I pushed the play button and a man with a heavy accent identified himself as an…
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November 23, 2016
The Voters Got Trump’s Message, Thankfully
Well, the man with the funny hair beat out the woman with the squeaky voice for the American presidency.
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•November 16, 2016
Juggling a Real Alternate Reality
A staple of science fiction is stories about alternate reality. In this type of story a minor change in the past causes a major change in the future. At many points in our past, a decision we made…
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•November 9, 2016
Saying Goodbye to a ‘Modern-Day Mae West’
Dorothy Regester Felton Turkot, better known asDotti Turkot, would have been 90 years old on Nov. 13, according to her obituary this summer from a local funeral home. In an earlier online bio I was…
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•October 26, 2016
My Short, But Effective, High School Football Career
This time of year and all the football hoopla bring back memories of my attempt at being a “football hero.”
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•October 5, 2016
‘What’s It All About, Alfie?’
“Is it just for the moment we live?” The closer we get to the most pathetic election in my 56 years of voting, the more persistentlythe lyrics from the 1960s movie “Alfie” echo in my brain.
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•September 28, 2016
Magic of LBI Included Smoking a Pipe on the Beach
As I have frequently mentioned in past columns for The SandPaper, my daughter, Claire, has been taking me to Long Beach Island on my wedding anniversary, Aug. 12, since 2010, the year my husband…
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•September 14, 2016
‘Never Forget’ – I Haven’t But Many Have
Sunday marked the 15th anniversary of the Sept. 11, 2001, tragedy at the World Trade Center. For me and thousands of others unfortunate enough to be personally affected by that horrific day, it might…
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•September 7, 2016
Going Solar on LBI: It’s a Win-Win
What if I said you could save money while helping the environment at no cost. Crazy, right?
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•August 31, 2016
Take the Call!
My mother is 90 years old and lives in upstate New York, near Hunter Mountain. Last year she hand-wrote four separate, identical books of her “life story” for each of her four granddaughters. She was…
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•August 24, 2016
LBI Beachcombing Leads to the Imperial
Whenever we visit LBI we always leave a piece of our hearts behind on this lovely Island. One day this past March proved to be an extraordinary adventure. Here is our story…
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•August 17, 2016
Let’s Toast LBI and Happy Endings
The dog days of summer are here, with Labor Day right around the corner. That means fall and winter are getting closer, and all I have to say about that is “yuck.” I don’t mind the fall, but I’m…
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•August 10, 2016
Taste Test: Do You Remember the Foods You Hated as a Kid?
I didn’t always love Swiss cheese. We were more of an American cheese family growing up. White, not yellow. Yellow reminded us too much of the government cheese we got for lunch at school before we…
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•July 27, 2016
Just Blame These Ramblings on Brain Toast
You have heard of brain freeze, I am sure. It is brought on by cold temperatures and cold ice cream. However, I bet you are not familiar with brain toast. With the recent temperatures hovering in the…
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•July 20, 2016
Writing, Wronging – and How I Do It
As an occasional contributor to The SandPaper, usually I write about people or situations. Sometimes my writing leads to wronging (ha, ha, ha). I’d be in trouble if some of my friends and relatives…
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•July 13, 2016
LBI Back in the Days of Rented Cottages and Lucy Evelyn
Even though we’ve lived in New Jersey all our lives, we did not discover Long Beach Island until 1968. My husband came home from a fishing trip and said, “Let’s rent a place on LBI!” He found two…
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•July 6, 2016
Caught in the Act of Bathing Suit Tryouts
My husband, Steven, came up to our bedroom door and jiggled the doorknob. “What’s wrong with the door?” he called.
