The New Jersey Department of Environmental Protection has just issued alerts for the public to be on the lookout for timber rattlesnakes. Such an alert is manna from media heaven for journalists. Publications around the state jumped on the timber rattlers, technically known asCrotalus horridus – though it absolutely doesn’t live up to the second part of that scientific name. More on that down below.

While the state’s current “Beware of Rattler” heads-up is aimed specifically at fairly nearby Manchester Township, I…