Around the anniversary of my brother’s death, I try to keep the happy memories foremostin my mind – there are so many. But I also am still so heartbroken over the circumstances of his death, and that will never change.

The memory of that terrible, sad day, the Tuesday after Easter, will haunt me for the rest of my life. It still feels like yesterday every time I “hit the wall” of my grief. I still cannot or will not ever be able to wrap my head around it.

My brother Billy committed suicide that rainy day in 2004. His death changed the lives of my family and friends…