I utilize the English language to the nth degree, professionally. Now, I’m being stunningly alerted to the fact I’m not nearly as adept as I thought at comprehending it, so to speak. It seems I’m among the unchosen few who are having one helluva time translating facemask speak.

While those around me, at places like church and TJ Maxx, display an uncanny proficiency at interpreting mumblese, it all sounds like muffled Greek to me.